The best laid plans ...

Ooh, I’m cross.  I really am Mrs Angry of NW3.

Who do you have to screw to get an answer from Camden’s Planning department?

We applied for planning consent as part of a house refurbishment back in November.  Here we are going 90 miles an hour toward the end of February and we're no further on than we were before we started.  Camden say that they aim to deal with planning applications within 8 weeks.  Pur-lease!

The alteration we want to make to improve the property is nothing more than several identical houses on the development have already done, what’s the problem?  Well, as it turns out, the problem is elderly neighbours who think that our raison d’être is to ruin their lives.  They’ve whipped up a storm of protest which means that the planning department must examine our case in fine detail rather than rubber stamp it, as they have done with other lucky people's applications.

I feel my soon-to-be neighbours’ pain, I really do.  If I was 108, I also wouldn’t want someone doing an extension and a very tiny basement (only under the extension) next door to me either but hey, this is London, shit happens and for some people at least, life must move forward.

I used to like old people.  I have elderly parents, I like their friends, I loved my grandparents and I’m assuming that one day, I’ll be a cranky old bird too. (One day?)

If we don’t go broke as a result of the delay and if we ever get to do this work and move into this house, Big-J is threatening payback, big time.  “I hope they like Bob Dylan played very loud late at night” he fumes.  “If one of them falls over in the street, it won’t be me who rushes out to help them” he seethes.  “I won’t even say hello when I see them” he adds with a sulky face. It’s all a bit worrying as it’s me who will be spending the majority of daylight hours in the house which we may or may not ever move into.

“Are you really going to be horrible to them?” I ask.  After two seconds of deep consideration he grunts “probably not”. In fact, he’s as unlikely to ignore an old lady in difficulty as I am.

So, mentally I'm already baking a cake and putting the kettle on in anticipation of Big-J inviting them in for a cuppa before offering to mow their lawn, walk their dogs and give them a lift to the shops - if he doesn't run them over first.

Note to self:  never buy a property in-between two old biddies ever, ever again!